This is another carryover from my old blog. It’s a bit outdated, as it’s pre-children, but I just thought it might help you get to know me better and understand my perspective.
When I was young and would hear crazy testimonies in high school youth group, I used to wish that I hadn’t grown up in a Christian home; I thought that I would understand God’s love so much better if I had lived the rebel life and had a radical conversion.
For a while, I tried to go through a rebellious phase to see what that was all about and to see if I could dance the line ending in a Prodigal Son homecoming. Pathetically, I was a rather timid rebel and didn’t really do much.
But then my parents died in a car accident when I was 20.
That really shook my faith, and I was so angry at God that I turned my back on Him and all the wonderful friends and family who loved me and wanted me to turn toward God for healing.
After years of rebelling in my own way, I heard God calling me–wooing me–and I did have that Homecoming I always dreamed of; my friends and family were there to welcome me back and celebrate that God’s hand had never left me.
But sometimes I really struggled understanding that God really did love me. I believed lies that God didn’t really want to forgive my years of rebellion and angry heart. I sometimes believed I would have to earn God’s Grace and convince Him that he made a good choice in loving me. But then He gave me the most wonderful gift: Rockstar! Rockstar loves me with the constant love of God and has been the biggest influence in my life teaching my about God’s beautiful Grace.